One afternoon last week, Stephen got off from work early and let me know that he had to be back in at 3:30 the next morning. This is one of my nighttime anxiety triggers but I’ve slowly been getting better. I used to have extreme trouble sleeping if I knew he was going to be gone before morning, and I’d have panic attacks while in bed. Over time, instead of panicking, I made a plan, which includes choosing a movie to watch if I woke up, deciding I would stay up until morning or almost morning (within maybe 45 minutes of sunrise), and being positive about having extra “me time.”
It has worked really well and I almost look forward to my middle of the night escapades, but I don’t because of how tired I am the next day. :P
Anyway, last week after finding out about his work schedule, I made a plan. I’d watch Chocolat with Johnny Depp, Juliette Binoche, and Judi Dench. And I’d work on a blog related stuff like photo editing. I was fine going to bed that night, which already counts as a success!
Related post: Night Anxiety ~ A Small Victory!
I first woke up to Elizabeth needing to nurse at 2:45am, about fifteen minutes before Stephen had to leave. I assumed I’d get up once she was done but the next thing I knew it was 4am! I’d gone back to sleep! I was so happy. :) And tired, lol. So, I closed my eyes, thinking I would get up in a minute. Again, time lapsed and the next time I looked at the clock it was 5:30! Hallelujah! I’d slept until morning! This is a first for me since the night anxiety started two years ago (when we moved into this house). Well, I was so proud of myself that I rolled to my other side and happily went back to sleep until my alarm went off an hour later. I dismissed the alarm and rewarded myself with one more hour of glorious sleep, lol.
What a fantastic night!