April 24, 2017
I absolutely did not want to get up early this morning (lol) but I had to so I could take Stephen to work and then drive to my post-op appointment in the afternoon. It’s as if Elizabeth knew the time, too, because at 5:28 she woke to breastfeed. When I finished feeding her, I got up and she continued sleeping. I responded to a few comments on my blog and read a couple of posts as I drank my coffee.
I threw on some clothes and then woke Maggie at 6:20 before leaving the house with Stephen ten minutes later. We talked about the day ahead and, thankfully, traffic moved reasonably well. I dropped him off and headed back home. I called Maggie to see if Elizabeth had woken because if not, I’d go to WalMart; well, she had woken so I drove by that exit on 75 and got home a few minutes later.
I found them in the living room with Elizabeth asleep, but stirring, on Maggie. I took her in the bedroom, she nursed again and I thought she’d go back to sleep but she didn’t. She was happy after eating and was content to play in the living room.
Samuel played a game on my tablet for a little while and then we put the electronics away and started getting ready for our busy day ahead.
While the big kids got ready, little chubby pants was fairly happy in our bedroom, though she was still feeling the effects of the illness she’s been fighting so she complained some and I responded as she needed me.
We were ready to leave shortly after 10am, which I was quite proud of, lol. Within five minutes, Elizabeth was asleep in her carseat and I jumped at the chance to run in different places while she slept! First, we stopped at Publix and I dropped off Maggie’s prescription which I wouldn’t come back for until Friday.
Next, we stopped in to Motherhood Maternity so I could buy another nursing bra. I absolutely love one of their bra designs! I wasn’t sure how I’d feel walking into a store for pregnant women, and I was pleased to find that there was only the slightest twinge of envy and sadness – I’d say that’s pretty good for all that I’ve been through in the last month! :)
Lately, I’ve been encouraging a different seating arrangement in the van. Instead of Maggie and Joshua taking turns sitting in the front seat, I’ve been asking them to both sit in the back. I’m doing this because 1) they interact more and (mostly) have fun together when they sit next to each other and 2) it’s nice to be “alone” while driving sometimes.
After Motherhood Maternity, we drove for awhile and finally arrived at a (small) local thrift store where we dropped off four or five bags of donations. Elizabeth had woken up a few minutes before we got there and was happy. I let her play in the front seat for a bit, which she loves.
Afterward, we drove across the street where I dropped Maggie and Joshua off at a larger thrift store. Samuel, Elizabeth and I went through the drive thru at Chick-fil-A to get sandwiches, okra and an ice cream (the last two things were for Samuel).
We then returned to the thrift store, went inside and looked at a few things with Maggie and Joshua. I was really excited when we found Gone with the Wind and Swiss Family Robinson on DVD for a few dollars each! :)
When we were done shopping, we quickly ate our lunch in the van (including Elizabeth nursing) and then made our way to my obstetrician’s office. It ended up being Joshua and Elizabeth with me, and Maggie and Samuel waiting outside together (on their devices).
I was really disappointed because the results from the d&c weren’t back yet so the appointment ended up being completely pointless. My doctor came in and we just sort of sat there! She was as anxious to get the results as I was, but it turns out that pathology had delayed things because the person in charge had forgotten to sign the report so it couldn’t be released to my doctor! I was sad while leaving the office because I’d been hoping/expecting to find out if it was a molar pregnancy or had just been an incomplete miscarriage. We had planned to go to a library and playground nearby after the appointment, so the doctor said I could go do that and IF they heard back from pathology while I was there, they would give me a call. If it was molar, I’d need to return for blood work, if not, I wouldn’t need to do any more blood draws.
We stopped at the library first; Elizabeth had fallen asleep shortly after leaving the doctor, so I stayed in the van with her while Maggie ran in to pick up the book(s) she wanted. Joshua got his skateboard out and rode around with Samuel watching nearby. I was sad and anxious while waiting, but then the medical secretary called me! She said they finally got word from the pathologist and he said while everything looks fine, they’re going to send it for more testing. Why?!! I just want this over with! So, my doctor said we should just wait on the blood work.
Elizabeth was still sleeping when we got to the park, so I put her carseat in the snap-in stroller. Joshua started riding his new skateboard and he found two boys who were bike riding so he joined them. I was feeling stressed out.
Meanwhile, Samuel was whining and complaining because he wasn’t playing with him at the park and he was “scared” of other kids (completely new revelation here). He starts telling me the story of how a boy hit him at the library recently for no reason (which I remember) but he has played with kids since then…why decide that you don’t want to play with kids now? I think it had a lot more to do with wanting his brother than of not wanting to play with others. *sigh*
I called Stephen and told him what had happened at the doctor and really there was nothing left to do except try to give it to the Lord. I found this exceptionally hard to do because I just want this all done. I’m tired of the emotions involved.
Elizabeth woke up and despite the photo’s appearance (lol), she was actually content. She zoned out for a few minutes though. ;)
Stephen called me back and said he was ready to be picked up from work so we packed things up; I nursed Elizabeth again and we left. Traffic wasn’t awful but it wasn’t good either and I found that I wasn’t dealing with the stress of the non-results and traffic combined.
At the same time, Joshua got a call from a kid in our neighborhood who told him that they thought they’d seen Maggie’s bike which had been stolen on Saturday night. They got all excited and I don’t know why but then the impact of the theft hit me full-force when I’d previously been handling it okay. UGH!!
We picked Stephen up after about forty-five minutes and headed home. When we arrived, Joshua saw that his yo-yo had come in the mail. He was happy but then we checked out the whole stolen bike thing and found that no, it wasn’t Maggie’s.
I was definitely stressed. I needed some time to process that maybe it was a molar and I still have more medical stuff coming. :( I couldn’t think about dinner, and I was upset because I hadn’t been able to stop by Walmart and get the few things that I’d needed (one that needed for dinner) so that started me crying! I rarely cry so I was definitely not doing well. Stephen jumped in – he decided to take Maggie and Samuel and go to the store for me, Joshua went outside to hang out with his friends and I was inside with Elizabeth, who I thought would be content to play, but no, she was fussy and wanted to be held nearly the entire time they were gone. She didn’t have a temperature but the rash that we’d been waiting to see show up (if it were roseola) showed up over the course of the day. I know she wasn’t feeling well. :( Neither was I, lol.
But then, they got home, we ate dinner and watched an episode of Home Improvement and I started feeling better. I got Elizabeth in bed, and then Samuel, and then just before I headed to bed myself, I checked my email. I had been sent the pathology results which included notes from the pathologist and my doctor. The reason he wanted to send it for further testing is not because it looked suspicious, in fact it looked completely normal to him, but because of the clinical presentation of a molar (my hCG numbers going down, then rising). So, after reading the email I felt much better and went to bed. I don’t know yet if it was molar or not but at least it doesn’t LOOK that way. :)
UPDATE: Click here to get the final results of the genetic testing.
Thanks for following along!
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